If this is what you called studying.

So, there was she. Studying for the Chemistry for her final exam, until she felt like her brain was so jammed, with the organic compound things. “Ohhh I’m going crazy if I keep going on like this”, that’s what her brain said so she grabbed her baby DSLR and started capturing photos until she forgot to revise on her Chemistry. But luckily that was when the study leave, so she still had some times to revise the Chemistry but still, she couldn’t answer the paper. Okay, sad ending kan Hikayat Merong MahaALG ini? Tskkk I cried when I read this. Okay hiperbola. Kthen let the pictures talk. Actually those pictures were taken during my study leave but I was sooo busy studying back then (kononnya la) , that’s why I’m just posting them today. Tupon sebab tak tahu nak update pasal apa -,- Enjoy the pictures, guys, eventhough they're not that beautiful.

Selingan ;

“Turn to Allah, he’s never far away, put your trust in Him, raise your hand and pray” – Maher Zain

“Dan orang yang sabar kerana mencari keredaan Tuhan mereka., dan mereka mendirikan solat serta menafkahkan sebahagian daripada rezeki yang Kami kurniakan kepada mereka, secara sembunyi dan terang-terangan. dan mereka menolak kejahatan dengan cara yang baik. Bagi mereka itulah kesudahan tempat (yang baik).” (Surah Ar-Ra’d  13:22) 

He'll always stay in my heart.

He will. Always. insyaAllah. 

Straight away after the exam, I looked at my phone. Got miscall from Mama. So I called her back. And hearing the news from Mama made me nearly collapsed. How can that happen? And why? Why Allah ambil dia? Why? That’s the first thing that lingers on my mind that time. Ya Allah, fragilenya iman aku time tu. And syaitan berpusu-pusu menyuruh aku menyalahkan takdir Allah. And at that time, the tears keep rolling and rolling down. That lil cousin of mine kembali ke Rahmatullah. Ya Allah, Al-Fatihah… Aku tahu Kau lebih sayangkan dia ya Allah. Aku tahu. But still, I’m too fragile for this. Make me stronger ya Rabb. I'm not blaming takdir Illahi and I'll never because I know, kepada Allah jugalah kita kembali. But, I'm just not strong enough.

He'll always stay in my heart. Yes, he will. 

All those memories that we shared together, will always stay in heart, and soul. He’s just 10 years old. Yes, ten. I just haven’t spent enough time with him yet. Tpi mesti ada hikmahkan kenapa Allah hadiahkan dia kepada kami the whole family, walaupuun sekejap je. It’s still rolling in my mind, all his laughs, all his playfulness, and all his cheerfulness that always keep me laughing. Ya Allah, it’s all gone. Gone….. everytime raya, at the kampung, I always putted a fight with him. Kitorang selalu gaduh-gaduh then gelak sama-sama. I miss that moment. Yes, I do.

He'll always stay in my heart. Yes, he will. 

It’s still fresh in my mind, how tabah he was. It’s almost 2 or 3months before I think. At that time, he didn’t follow his family going back to Terengganu because he decided to stay in kampung, sebab nak main PS with another cousins. So the third day he was in kampung, he still looked so cheerful and we did even fought as usual. Then sampailah masa he said he wanna take bath. The time he’s taking his bath, i went to the toilet besides the bathroom and heard someone crying. And yes, it’s him. He sounded so pitiful to me at that time. Then after he finished bathing, he dressed up and datang main dengan kitorang macam biasa, like nothing happened. Then aku ajak dia jalan-jalan, it was almost night. Then I asked him “Ammar ke nangis tadi?”. At first he denied it but then he started to cry again. So I hugged him and asked why. He said he missed his mum so much but he didn’t want to tell others because he was afraid that he’ll burden others. He was crying on my shoulder at that time and I dialed her mum’s phone and let he talked with his mum. And that time, aku terfikir, ya Allah, tabahnya budak ni, rindu family tapi nangis sorang-sorang belakang orang lain. He’s hurt inside but he kept it silent, sebab takut menyusahkan orang lain. He’s just ten but yet, he was more mature than me. Thanks Ammar, for giving me a lesson a life. It’ll always stay as a sweet memory between me and you.

He'll always stay in my heart. Yes, he will. 

Ya Allah, place him in Jannah please. Amin. Ammar tunggu Kak Ngah kat sana eh, sayang. Please, stay in peace there and wait me there. I miss the time you were around, but I’m so grateful for every moment I spent with you, cause I know life won’t last forever. You went so soon, you left so soon , I’ve got to stop the tears, keep my faith and be strong. I’ll try to take it all, even though it’s so hard. I see you in my dreams but when I wake up you are gone. Gone so soon. But it’s just too soon for me. I miss you already, Ammar :'(



Bukak Love Letter after hearing the news, found this :

“Patutkah manusia menyangka bahawa mereka akan dibiarkan dengan hanya berkata: Kami beriman, sedang mereka tidak diuji (dengan sesuatu cubaan)? Kami telah menguji orang-orang yang terdahulu daripada mereka, maka (dengan ujian yang demikian), nyata apa yang diketahui Allah tentang orang-orang yang sebenar-benarnya beriman dan nyata pula apa yang diketahuiNya tentang orang-orang yang berdusta.” (Al-Ankabut, 29:02-03)


And ayat biasa yang selalu tenangkan hati kita, (2:286) :)



Thank you Allah. Al-Fatihah, again.

Dont go astray.

Allahuakbar. Ya Allah, please just let this feeling stay as a 'respect' feeling towards him. Jangan dicambahkan rasa lain. Bimbang terlalai. Subhanallah. Ya Allah, jagalah hati aku. Dont let this fragile lil heart go astray.

And it breaks through my soul.

Assalamualaikum earthlings. I'm now sitting for my end-of-sem A-level examination and tomorrow I'm gonna sit for my last paper. Hooorayyyy! For those yang baru start exam, silalah jealous. Haha. Penat tau tak exam ni? Hari-hari if boleh sleep more than 3hours tu macam heaven gila tau tak? A-level is killing me, seriously. Bear with it Fatin. Allah dah cakap kan,

"Oleh itu, maka (tetapkanlah kepercayaanmu) bahawa sesungguhnya tiap-tiap kesukaran disertai kemudahan, bahawa sesungguhnya tiap-tiap kesukaran disertai kemudahan. Kemudian apabila engkau telah selesai (daripada sesuatu amal soleh), maka bersungguh-sungguhlah engkau berusaha (mengerjakan amal soleh yang lain). Dan kepada Tuhanmu sahaja hendaklah engkau memohon" (Al-Insyirah 94:4-8)

So, keep believing in Him and tawakkallah. InsyaAllah everything's gonna be fine :') Thank you ya Allah, for always being by my side, everytime I need You :)

And yes, I'm going back to Kelantan this Wednesday! Like what? Tak sabar gila okay. OMG cant wait for the moment. Wanna meet Mama, Abah and the siblings. Miss them so much. But then I've to come back to Shah Alam the next Sunday. Kejap gila cuti. Because I'll be having my Practical in GMI. Leceh tau tak jadi budak A-level German ni. Busy je memanjang. But this is the path that I've chose. So, tahanlah wahai hati. Be strong please.

Okay dah. Have to study for my last paper tomorrow, Physics Unit 3B. InsyaAllah it's gonna be easy. Allahumayaasirwalatuasir. Pray for me people. And yes, tak sabar nak activate my Twitter account back tomorrow, after deactivating it for about 3weeks. Hihi. Twitter, wait for me yaww ;) Gotta go. Have to do my best for the Physics paper tomorrow. May we'll always be bleesed, insyaAllah. Kthen, bye and assalmualaikum.

Btw, found this from someone's blog, "KALAU BENAR CINTA KERANA ALLAH, BIARKAN IA MENGALIR IKUT ALIRAN DAN KETENTUAN ILAHI" (:

Seasons are changing

And waves are crashing

And stars are falling all for us

Days grow longer and nights grow shorter

Have no time to think about the tittle.

I'm sorry, but I have to be firm. And I know I'm on the right track. Really hope that I am. Amin. Protect me, my Rabb.

The Strength that She Needs.

Assalamulaikum people. It's been a loooooooong time since I updated this blog right? Err is it 6 months long? Nahh, baru 4bulan, tapi dah rasa lama -,- I always wanted to update this blog, but, you know, being an A-Level student is so hectic you know. Busy with the study stuffs and all. For the sake of ilmu kan. So just now when I opened back my blog rasa macam, ya Allah, macam ni ke blog aku dulu? Rasa like so useless because before this I dont fully use my blog to share/contribute something to the world and to the Muslim world. Useless kan saya dulu. Asyik blogging pasal personal life and duniawi stuffs je. Tskk. And looking at my blog's tittle, there's even 'XOXO <3' there. That shows how immature I was before. Okay sekarang bajet dah matang ke Fatin? Haha. And, just have a look on my header, side notes and all. Rasa macam.... Entah, susah nak describe rasa ini. Thinking of changing the whole blog back, but tengoklah, I'm just kinda too busy lately. And I'm also thinking of being an active blogger back. Seriously, I miss blogging. InsyaAllah I will, kalau segala jalan dipermudahkan oleh Allah kelak. Seriously, I wanna share something to the world through my blog as well, as others did. And yes, terima kasih INTEC, for changing me to be a better person. and yes, ahamdulillah ya Rahman, for guiding me all the right way long. I know, the current me is still imperfect and banyak khilaf. So please, pleasse give me strength to live in this world with your barakah, ya Allah. Give me strength to face everything. Because I'm weak, without You, ya Allah. Please be..


Gotta go, got so many homeworks to do. Okay then people, have a nice day, filled with His barakah. Assalamualaikum, again .

Let's endure the storm.

Allah, bagilah kekuatan kepadaku untuk berubah. I wanna be better and I know I should. Bertimpa dugaan yang datang, jangan dilenturkan semangat itu. Because, she knows that she's not that strong.

“Sesungguhnya Allah tidak akan mengubah nasib suatu kaum kecuali kaum itu sendiri yang mengubah apa apa yang pada diri mereka ” Ar-Ra'ad 13:11

Strengthen yourself Fatin. You know you can do it.

Assalamualaikum.